Better than I (Video)

Didn’t think I’d find it on YouTube, but I did!! Now you get to watch the song too…

Better than I

As I was talking to a dear friend about the situations we’re both individually facing, I was suddenly reminded of a song from the movie Joseph:King of Dreams by DreamWorks. I highly recommend this show – it’s as good as The Prince of Egypt, if you’ve watched that one.

Anyhoo, did a bit of research for the song title and singer for the song I was looking for and the song is entitled "Better than I" by David Campbell.

Joseph sings this (the movie’s a musical) when he’s imprisoned for attempting to harass his employer’s wife (He was framed by her). So he’s pretty much stuck in a situation where there’s a high chance he’d be in prison for life or could be sentenced to death. It was something he did not do and his bright future has pretty much gone down the drain. In short, he’s in a bad state. Then this song comes along, where he sings that God knows more than he will ever know, He knows why he’s there and what’s in store for him. It never fails to make me tear every time I watch that part of the movie.

It sort of reminded me about the things I’ve gone through and am going through now. I don’t understand them. I don’t. But He does. He knows why, He knows when, He knows it all.

He knows better than I.

I thought I did what’s right
I thought I had the answers
I thought I chose the surest road
But that road brought me here
So I put up a fight
And told You how to help me
Now just when I have given up
The truth is coming clear

You know better than I
You know the way
I’ve let go the need to know why
For You know better than I

If this has been a test
I cannot see the reason
But maybe knowing I don’t know
Is part of getting through
I try to do what’s best
And faith has made it easy
To see the best thing I can do
Is put my trust in You

For You know better than I
You know the way
I’ve let go the need to know why
For You know better than I

I saw one cloud and thought it was a sky
I saw a bird and thought that I could follow
But it was You who taught that bird to fly
If I let You reach me, will You teach me

For You know better than I
You know the way
I’ve let go the need to know why
I’ll take what answers You supply
You know better than I

I know I know.. a song’s pretty empty with just the lyrics to read without the music to go with it. I’ll try to see what I can do to get the music put up. In the meantime, go watch the movie.

Times like these

It is times like these that I shake my head in dismay, questioning the special freedom children should have,

It is times like these, I ask whatever happened to the idea of unity, equality and justice for all,

It is times like these, I wonder when are we ever protected from death,

It is times like these I ask why, why, why

It’s times like these, I wished I could zone out and pretend none of it all had happened

It’s times like these, I hoped that the future didn’t have to be so difficult

It’s times like these that makes me yearned for a better situation to be in

It’s times like these that I hoped we were better

Times like these make me look back and remember the good times we had

Times like these make me reminisce and smile, knowing I will never forget them

Times like these make me wish those good times will never come to an end

Times like these remind me that in this life, good times will also never cease

It is times like these that point me to a God who is still in control on His throne

It is times like these that forces me to let go of my grip, lift my eyes to heaven and surrender

It is times like these that drive me to live and strengthen my faith in Him

It is times like these I hear You say, Lord, “My grace is sufficient….for you.”

No cats!

Translation: Do not throw abandon cats within hospital grounds.               

   – Hospital Administration, Batu Pahat Hospital

This is the first sign that greets you upon entering the hospital.

I’m glad that some others understand my intense dislike for cats.

Thank You

Yours, O LORD, is the greatness and the power
and the glory and the majesty and the splendor,
for everything in heaven and earth is Yours.
Yours, O LORD, is the kingdom; You are exalted as head over all.

Wealth and honor come from You;
You are the ruler of all things.
In Your hands are strength and power
to exalt and give strength to all.

Now, our God, we give You thanks,
and praise Your glorious name.

1 Chronicles 29:11-13

Happy Thanksgiving!!

Jesus and Alexander

Poem by Charles Ross Weeds

Jesus and Alexander died at thirty three
One lived and died for self; one died for you and me,
The Greek died on a throne;    the Jew died on a cross,
One’s life a triumph seemed;    the other but a loss,
One led vast armies forth;    the other walked alone,
One shed a whole world’s blood;     the other gave His own,
One won the whole world in life and lost it all in death,
The other lost His life to win the whole world’s faith.

Jesus and Alexander died at thirty three,
One died in Babylon;      and one on Calvary,
One gained all for self;    and one Himself He gave,
One conquered every throne;    the other, every grave,
One won all the earth, to lose all earth and heaven,
The other gave up all, that all to Him be given,
The Greek forever died;   the Jew forever lives
He loses all who only gets;    and wins all who truly gives

*Got this in an email today. What a contrast, what a contrast.

Rain, rain, go away

Perhaps it’s time I inject some personal touches to the blog. Let’s talk about me! (yes I know you’ve been dying to hear the juicy stories!)

It’s Nov 20, 2007. 12:50pm. Got back from the hospital early today but will have to go back to the campus at 2:30pm later for a briefing to our new posting. It’s pouring outside – one of the many raining episodes (lengthy ones too) here in Batu Pahat. Hearing the intensity of water gushing down from the sky outside, I’m not surprised if the floods will return today. Brace yourselves, Johor.

Welllllll…it’s not only gushing water outside, it’s gushing inside my room too. Ok. Maybe I’m exaggerating. It’s dripping, trickling from the ceiling to my pail. YES. I live in a room with a defect in the ceiling. I’ve reminded our landlord so many times even I’m tired of complaining to him, since it always seem to fall into deaf ears. Looks like I’ll have to call him again later. The rainy season isn’t going to end soon. sigh.

What else. We just started our Medicine posting. Went into the female ward for the first time. It was exactly like what my friends who have been in there described it – a refugee camp. Beds were everywhere and trolleys and people walking. Patients on my allocated beds were so sick, it was difficult to even talk to them..except for one lady. It’s a crazy place in there. It smells and it’s not exactly the cleanest place (in comparison to the wards I’ve been to in my previous posting). Sigh. The place has already turn me off from the excitement of my new posting. It’s sad that BP Hospital doesn’t set up more wards for the medical cases, since there is an abundant number of cases admitted and the hospital doesn’t seem to be lacking in supply of doctors anyway (Considering the amount of HOs there were in Paeds). The attitude of one doctor I saw in the ward has also turned me off (I’ve been told about this man before). Definitely an example I do not want to follow when I graduate. I shall not dwell in the details. Actually I met another doctor from the medical ward even before I started the posting… and well, let’s just say he/she didn’t quite give me a good impression. Sigh.

Today is officially the first day of the second half of my stay here in BP. Another two and a half months to go! Sometimes it does feel like it has sped by, some days were preeettttyyyy draggy. What do I think of BP so far? Here are some keywords I’ve associated it with: smallish (compared to good ol’ KL), very hot, very rainy, non-Canto ppl, gangster town, smelly water, nicer hospital (compared to Seremban), supposedly famous otak-otak, nasi briyani gam, very few Indians (compared to Seremban), monkeys, lizards…..and leaky roof. We’ll see what the next two and a half months bring. I imagined disastrous days ahead.

Your invisible presence

 

In the whispers of the night, I hear you call

Softly, steadily

Never diminishing, never ceasing

In the steady beats of the second, You march on

Unwavering, unstoppable

Until I hear you cry

At that very hour, I am made aware of you

Merciless, uncompromising you

“Why should I wait?” I hear you roar

“You know time and tide waits for no man”

At that very minute, I knew you were right

Why should you wait

For the slow, for the weak, for those who fall behind

You cannot delay, you must keep going

The world depends on you to survive

 

“Carpe Diem”

The voices call out to me

Seize the day!

Grab hold of it by its neck

Reap the moments, until it dies

Dimming into the horizon

Then it is no more and forgotten

 

“There is a time for everything”

I hear another shout

Time to laugh, time to weep

There is time for everything under the sun

But life is short

The birth of a new day may never come

Who knows how many tomorrows I may have

Seasons come, seasons go

But what am I at the end of the years

Have we grown better, older

As you would want us to be

 

You watched as generations live and die

You survived eras and millenniums

Oh, what pain it must be for you

To witness those who are born

Breathe their last

But you remained the same

Strong and young

Keeping the steady pace in tuned into you

No wonder it had made you so cruel

No wonder you are pitiless

But this is what life is

Engraved into the very core of your rhythm

Our end is set before us

Count what we have

Then make it count for His glory

Batu Pahat and the things attached to it

 

Just downloaded Windows Live Writer – a super cool application to help me write better blog entries and doing much more in it than before from just typing from windows live space website.

Did a little playing around with it and saw the super cool insert map feature. Oooooohhh. Interesting. Thought I’d show you where I am right now. See the town right at the bottom right corner, right above the scale? That’s a little town called Batu Pahat.

See the huge name upper left corner? That’s home. Some good three hours drive away.

I don’t have many pictures of this town to show. Only a few of the hospital – the place I spent most of my days. 

 

 

Here’s the hospital at night. Took it on one of my on-call nights. It actually looks like a resort. No kidding.

 

 

This is warn all patients who so choose to be admitted into the hospitals that they will very likely be meddled with by medical students.

 

 

 

The corridor where we walk through everyday to the wards….

 

 

 

The Accident and Emergency Department where we occasionally visit.

Dear Mr. Pullman

Excerpt from Mr. Philip Pullman’s website:

His Dark Materials seems to be against organised religion.

Do you believe in God?

I don’t know whether there’s a God or not. Nobody does, no matter what they say. I think it’s perfectly possible to explain how the universe came about without bringing God into it, but I don’t know everything, and there may well be a God somewhere, hiding away.

Actually, if he is keeping out of sight, it’s because he’s ashamed of his followers and all the cruelty and ignorance they’re responsible for promoting in his name.

If I were him, I’d want nothing to do with them.

Dear Mr. Pullman,

You are right. If we were God, we’d want nothing to do with us. Who would want to bother about the human race – selfish, conceited, greedy, always fighting each other, immoral… sinful. But the fact here, sir, is this: we are NOT God. And you know that yourself. You said if.

We are NOT God.

God is God. No one else is. Nobody can ever be and this is what we know about Him:

God is holy. God is just. God is love. God is merciful.

God is holy.

He is perfect. Sinless. Not a single stain is upon Him. He is not human, which is why He is pure.

God is just.

He cannot stand sin. He hates it. He hates the fact the human race is destroying each other day after day. He hates it when men cheat each other in business deals. He hates it when a teenager cheats in an exam. He hates it when man is with another man’s wife. He hates every single sin you can name, Mr. Pullman.

Now if we were God, this hatred would have caused us to destroy every single person alive… because everybody (from the beginning of time to the end of it) is sinful. They need to pay for their sins, and the payment for sin is death. Only death can pay away our sins. Not any amount of money can bail us out from sin to making us pure before God. How can anybody live and be sinless, when the fact is every living person is sinful? It’s illogical. Only death pays the cost.

BUT we are not God. (Thank God)

God is love.

It’s like a synonym. Love (the unconditional pure ones, untainted and true) is God. It’s an equation. God = love.

He is wholly, completely love. He hates sin, but He loves us…everyone. But everyone was on its way to pay for the penalty for sin…everybody was going to die. But He loved us. He loved us when we screamed at our parents. He still loved us when we lied to our friends.

He loved us even when we hated Him.

But really, what is the point of saying I love you when it means nothing, right, Mr. Pullman? That’s like a clanging gong. Like a father who repeatedly says that but does nothing to show it. 

But God said it, meant it and showed it.

And this is the demonstration of God’s love, Mr. Pullman.

“For God so loved the world that He gave His one and only Son…” John 3:16

“This is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down his life for us….” 1 John 3:16

He gave His only Son. For us. To die. In our place. He loved us enough to sacrifice His very own Son.

Could you do that, Mr. Pullman? Could you let your very own son, your own flesh and blood die in place for the next murderer, who lashed and killed several young boys, who is sentenced to be executed tomorrow? Probably not. We wouldn’t bother. We’d allow the man to pay for his own sins. He did it, let him die for it. But this is because we do not love that man. Even if we do, we do not love him enough to sacrifice our own for him. But God does. God loves that man enough. He loves the greatest sinner there is on this earth. He loves us all, each and everyone of us.. and He loved us enough to send His very own…. to die the worst kind of death. For us.

This is love. And that makes all the difference. But the story is not over.

God is merciful.

He gave us what we did not deserve. We did not do Him any favour. We did not achieve anything exceptional to earn that love. He did not just pay for that penalty of death for us, Mr. Pullman. He gave us more. Much much more.

“For God so loved the world that He gave His one and only Son that whoever believes in Him, will not perish, but have everlasting life.” John 3:16

Life forever. We escaped death. Now we can live forever… and not just stuck here on earth forever, Mr. Pullman, but life forever in heaven. We get to live in the grandest biggest mansion…forever. That’s a big word. Forever. Never ending. No end. Eternity. ONLY if we believe in Jesus.

And the deal doesn’t just start when we go to heaven, sir. It begins now. He promises to be with us here on earth, everyday. He will not leave us, nor forsake us. He will lift us up in times of trouble when we call to Him. He promises us much and will keep to them.

“And surely, I am with you always, to the very end of the age.” Matthew 28:20

We are NOT God, Mr. Pullman. God alone is and always will be. He did not hide, Mr. Pullman. He has always been here. He even provided the solution to granting us eternal life… through his only Son. He is in the air you breathe, He is in the gentle evening breeze, He is in the strongest storm, He is in the rising sun, and the night-sky moon. He is there…it’s whether we see Him there or not.

I choose to believe in God…and I pray that someday, you will too.

Sincerely,

Lydia