Archive for January, 2008

Last night in Batu Pahat

Posted in Thoughts on January 31, 2008 by Lydia

This is insane. It’s 3AM, the night before my job interview, and I’m racing through my assignments like there’s no tomorrow. So tired. How am I going to be alert tomorrow.. or rather in several hours time?

Sigh. My room’s all packed up. Looks exactly like it was when I first moved in. Reminded me a lot of the first few days I stepped into this town. For one thing I can tell, I definitely felt different then than now. So much has happened within the span of these 5 months. A lot of hard reality hitting facts. Some good ones, some, well, not-so-good ones. As I packed up my things, really was reminded so much of the past. A lot of memories. Been through a lot. Argh. ok ok. I’ll shut up now. Had in mind to write something more concrete and meaningful, but I think the late/early hour has gotten into me and my thought process. I’m not making sense. I think I should hit the sack for a few hours of sleep or I will babble nonsense to my interviewers… and to top it off, I have very poor proficiency in the Malay language. Sigh. More work awaits later.

Praise You in this storm

Posted in Music on January 29, 2008 by Lydia

by Casting Crowns

I was sure by now
God, that You would have reached down
and wiped our tears away
stepped in and saved the day
But once again, I say Amen
and it’s still raining
as the thunder rolls
I barely hear You whisper through the rain,
“I’m with you”
and as Your mercy falls
I raise my hands and praise
the God who gives and takes awayChorus:
And I’ll praise You in this storm
and I will lift my hands
You are who You are
no matter where I am
and every tear I’ve cried
You hold in Your hand
You never left my side
and though my heart is torn
I will praise You in this storm

I remember when I stumbled in the wind
You heard my cry to You
and raised me up again
my strength is almost gone
how can I carry on
if I can’t find You
and as the thunder rolls
I barely hear You whisper through the rain
“I’m with you”
and as Your mercy falls
I raise my hands and praise
the God who gives and takes away

I lift my eyes onto the hills
where does my help come from?
My help comes from the Lord
the Maker of heaven and earth

 

 

Tragedies after the other

Posted in News and politics on January 28, 2008 by Lydia

Bus accidents in the past 3 months (from Nov 2007 to Jan 2008)
Bus accidents in the past 3 months (from Nov 2007 to Jan 2008)

When I should be working on completing my portfolios, I spent the morning searching out all the bus accidents which seemed to have grown in number recently. I’ve collected them through my search in The Star newspaper online and have plotted them on the map for you to view the locations and shocking number of accidents, the number of people who have died and been injured from bus accidents alone in the past 3 months. Here’s a timeline of the accidents which have occured and the headlines in relation to bus transportation which I thought were noteworthy to be read amongst the accident stories. Full stories can be read when you click on the purple words.

Nov 3, 2007 - Eight passengers injured when Royal Malaysian Navy bus crashed into ravine and overturned near Sungai Rengit, Kota Tinggi.

Nov 4, 2007Bus went up in flames, at least four cars smashed near Lembah Beringin at the exit of North-South Expressay near Ipoh. Reason? Bus driver tried to avoid a POLICE CAR which had collided with another vehicle. Reports said "No one died."

Dec 4, 2007Bus passenger broke his leg, twenty two suffered light injuries after his bus collided with a trailer, along the North-South Expressway, near Malacca. It was his first express bus ride.

Dec 11, 2007Seven killed, twenty eight injured in bus crash when bus crashed into back of latex tanker at the accident-prone Jelapang toll plaza. Bus driver’s last words, "Brek tak makan, brek tak makan! (translated: The brakes are not working!!)".

Dec 12, 2007Penang bus drivers lodged reports against other drivers for threatening them bodily harm. Used bus to threaten other drivers.

Dec 14, 2007Motion to discuss Jelapang’s toll plaza accident rejected by the House of Parliament. Deputy Speaker Datuk Lim Si Cheng says it’s "public importance" but "not urgent". WOW. Amazing.

Dec 14, 2007Nine injured (one with fractured skull) when their bus collided with a cement-laden trailer along the North-South Expressway near the Jawi toll plaza, close to Nibong Tebal. After the accident, bus’ spare tyre fell off and injured a motorcyclist.

Dec 18, 2007Nineteen injured when their express bus crashed into the back of a latex tanker, near Sungkai, along the North-South Expressway.

Dec 22, 2007Car driver killed when oncoming tourist bus crashed into him, near Butterworth, along the North-South Expressway. 6 passengers from the bus injured. Bus driver was not. Reason? Front-right tyre of the bus punctured and bus driver lost control.

Dec 23, 2007Two men killed when an express bus ploughed into them when they were fixing a stalled car along the emergency lane along the North-South Expressway, near Seremban.

Dec 30, 2007Man burnt to death and another fractured his legs when his car parked along the North-South expressway emergency lane was hit by a bus rammed into him, near Batu Pahat, along Ayer Hitam and Yong Peng.

Jan 2, 2008Man died after involved in a road accident with Rapid Penang bus in Teluk Bahang in Penang.

Jan 6, 2008Fourteen injured when bus hit divider and crashed into another car on the opposite lane, near Ipoh Selatan toll plaza along the North-South Expressway. (What are dividers for?)

Jan 10, 2008Bus operators want to increase bus fares. Claimed reason is increased fuel and inspection price.

Jan 18, 2008Long distance bus fares going up, possibly by 100%. (Thank goodness I’m moving out from Batu Pahat soon!) Will people ever use buses now – in view of the number of accidents, the danger.. and now the increased price?

Jan 22, 2008Two killed, two injured when speeding express bus plunged into ravine, near Johor Baru, along the Kulai-Johor Baru highway.

Jan 25, 2008Three died, nine injured when double decker express bus driver lost control, skidded, slammed into divider and landed on its side, along the North-South Expressway between Slim River and Behrang. Driver gets a broken leg. Three passengers of oncoming car injured.

Today (Jan 28, 2008)’s headlines: Robbed of bright future. Medical Student Lee Nian Ning 21 year old who was involved in Jan 25’s bus crash. There seems to be a closer connection to her in that we’re both medical students. Somehow I can really feel her family’s loss. It’s a lot to lose, not because she’s a medical student, but I can understand the sacrifices her family has made to put her through medical school, and the sacrifices she’s made to get into it and the loss of such a bright future for her. She wanted to be an orthopaedic surgeon. It would have been my choice too (if I were bigger and taller). My condolences to her family.

What does our Deputy PM says? Or rather what did he say in March 2006(Click on the article for a larger view)

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What did he say in January 2008, twenty two months later? Read. You judge for yourself. 

RSS me!

Posted in Computer and Internet on January 28, 2008 by Lydia

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Ha!! Bet you didn’t know you can…

Oh… You did? You have?
Anyhoo.. for the sake of those who didn’t they could or for those who do not know what it is… just follow the instructions given below:

1. Scroll to the portion on the right column of my blog where you will see the section as shown in the picture. See the word

"Subscribe to RSS feed"? Click.

2. Some page will show up asking you whether you want to subscribe to this feed. You click yes..or subscribe.. or whatever that says yes.

3. Now you will receive new updates from my blog into whichever program-which-you-should-have-somehow-in-your-computer whenever I have written something new! Yes. This is something you so want. It’ll save you time from checking back frequently whether I have updated or not (which of course, I will not stop you from doing. Feel free to come back whenever you want, read and re-read whatever inspirational (haha) things I’ve wrote. :) )
Think of RSS like your regular Mr. Newspaper man who delivers to you fresh papers (if there is any) to your doorstep.

To those of you a-LITTLE-bit-outdated people, who didn’t know that RSS actually stands for "Really Simple Syndication" and not "Repetitive Strain Syndrome" or "Rigid Spine Syndrome" or better still "RuneScape Signatures" (which I think my sister would know!),
go
here and learn up!

"…do not grieve, for the joy of the Lord is your strength." Nehemiah 8:10b

Like a smack to my face

Posted in Thoughts on January 27, 2008 by Lydia

I was angry and frustrated. In fact, I was just pouring out to a good friend last night about how angry I was and that the whole world had done me harm and I was the victim of the worst calamity known to mankind. (Okay… maybe that’s a little exaggerated, but still!)

The point is I was angry. And hurt. And frustrated. And angry. And disappointed. Did I say I was angry?
I asked God, "Lord, YOU said that if I delight myself in You, YOU will give me the desires of MY heart! I did delight myself in You before this, where’s the desires of my heart?"
Yes. I used that exact phrase. Those angry and bitter words, I hurled back at God. Why why why. (Don’t we ever stop asking why?)

This morning. Did my usual quiet time. I didn’t feel like it. Felt like I was drifting away.
Then I read this morning’s devotional…"A Sheer Delight" (click on it to read it) and the scripture was taken from Psalm 37.
Opened my Bible and began reading…
(Below’s the version of the Bible I use – New Living Translation)
——————————————————————–
1 Don’t worry about the wicked
      or envy those who do wrong.

(Right, I’ve been envious of a lot of people. Why they can achieve and get things they want so easily? It’s not fair)
2 For like grass, they soon fade away.
      Like spring flowers, they soon wither.

3 Trust in the Lord and do good.
      Then you will live safely in the land and prosper.

(And up until this point… I was shocked. Here’s the exact same verse which I had used against God…)
4 Take delight in the Lord,
      and he will give you your heart’s desires.

(The version I had memorized as a child and had used was taken from NIV and reads as this: "Delight yourself in the Lord and he will give you the desires of your heart. Up at this point, I was almost going to break, and I asked Him, "Why did You let me read this now today? Of ALL verses!"
Little did I know that the answer lies in the next few lines…)

5 Commit everything you do to the Lord.
Trust him, and he will help you.
6 He will make your innocence radiate like the dawn,
      and the justice of your cause will shine like the noonday sun.

7 Be still in the presence of the Lord,
      and wait patiently for him to act.
(Pretty much like a combination of Psalm 46:10 "Be still and know that I am God" and Isaiah 40:31 "but those who wait for the Lord will renew their strength…". Both verses which have been very dear to me. It was like *wham* *wham* – a hit on my head to wake me up to my senses.)
   Don’t worry about evil people who prosper
      or fret about their wicked schemes.

(Now here comes the instructions….and it couldn’t get anymore obvious than that)
8 Stop being angry!
      Turn from your rage!
   Do not lose your temper—
      it only leads to harm.
9 For the wicked will be destroyed,
      but those who trust in the Lord will possess the land.

10 Soon the wicked will disappear.
      Though you look for them, they will be gone.
11 The lowly will possess the land
      and will live in peace and prosperity.
———————————————————————————–

I was left stunned. Did not know what else to say. I kept asking "God, why this.. why now… I was happy being in the angry state (well, technically it’s not a happy thing being angry, but it felt right and justified). Because this means I cannot be angry anymore. How can I not be angry? It was a natural thing to feel! WRONG. It was detrimental to me and to my friends’ (the MANY of you wonderful, wonderful ones) ears. It was hurting and slowly acidifying me.

It’s not going to be easy not being angry. (Double negatives should make a positive right? It’s going to be easy being angry. Yeah. Sounds right. In case that confused you, It’s going to be difficult being unangry [there is such a word. check the dictionary. I did!])
But I’m going to have to try. Well, at least try and let Him take over and give me the strength to try and continue trying. Sigh. God help me!

Blog stats

Posted in Update on January 26, 2008 by Lydia

 Picture2  

My blog has been up for about 34 months now… Yes, I took the time and trouble to count my archives. I looked up my statistics as of 11:10pm as I have had my page viewed 9043 times. Wow. This week alone 141 views. These may be small numbers to the professional bloggers, but for an amateur like me.. Wow. So if we take the total of 9043 times my page has been viewed and divide it by 34 months, there would be an average of 266 views per month. Now obviously that cannot be true. I don’t have such large number of readers. But to those of you who are reading this, just wanted to say thanks for your support and your continuity in sticking by and reading the boring boring thoughts I post up. Your visits are greatly appreciated. Do leave a message or two whenever you feel like it. If you scroll all the way down to the bottom of this page, I’ve added a map of where some of my visitors hail from. Really cool feature!!

To the years ahead

Posted in Thoughts on January 26, 2008 by Lydia

ahh! Had meant to put up my batch picture with the previous post…but completely forgot about it then! Anyway, here’s a picture of the whole group of us (well, half of our original group which started out in 2003)… from the stay at Parit Othman.

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Here’s to the two and a half years we’ve toiled at Seremban, and now at Batu Pahat together…

We have come this far, almost close to the finishing line,
Through exams (and more exams…and more exams), they just never ever seem to end,
From crazy first year medical students, now we’ve been refined,
To still crazy doctors, colleagues and most of all, friends.

To the road ahead, wherever it may take you,
Places far or places near, across the ocean or just next door,
Just remember, the passion and the reason to which this career and life we choose to pursue,
Carry it in your deepest core, as it transforms us to be doctors who are real and know what should matter more.

C2/05, thanks for your friendship and never-ending support.. and most of all, thanks for the memories.

Last day of Med School

Posted in Thoughts on January 25, 2008 by Lydia

My last day (hopefully) of official classes at medical school is coming to an end. Wow. This is it.
No more classes.
No more lectures.
No more clinical discussions and case presentations.
No more task/problem based learning.

Feels pretty surreal. The end (well, almost the end) of my whole five years is finally here. Five years has passed by and I have gained a tremendous amount of knowledge and skill – so much that it should be (emphasis) enough for me to see sick patients and know how to manage them. Heavy responsibility. The reality of the career is at my doorstep and it’s already knocking its way in. Job interviews to work for the government will be held next week. Because of my age and through some random sheer luck, I’m going to be the last of my whole batch to be interviewed on the last day. Sigh. Great. Either very little or a whole lot of attention is placed on the last candidate. After which, exam’s will be in a month’s time… and if all goes well, IF ALL GOES WELL… my name will carry that heavy burden of Dr. before it.

This momentous transition hasn’t really sunk in yet. Right now, my brain and body somehow still tells me that there’s class tomorrow or next week, I can still go for classes and learn from my lecturers and supervisors, there’s still going to be guidance and a pair of eyes to watch me when I make mistakes to patients. It really hasn’t been embedded in my being that I will have none of that anymore. I’ll be on my own from now onwards. My wings should be able to take me to fly to greater heights. But I don’t feel like leaving the nest yet! It’s too comforting to be able to hide behind the cover of ‘medical student’ and grin when I make a stupid mistake… at least it won’t kill a patient…yet. ARGH!

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campus_seremban

 

 

 

campus_batupahat 

 

Medical school at IMU has changed me so much. Right from the beginning of March 2003… and right to the end, well.. at present January 2008, but I officially end in March 2008. In this course off five years, God has blessed me with so much – so much than I could ever ask for, but as much as He has given, so much has He also taken away. He’s proven Himself faithful through and through, year in and year out… and even at this moment of time, when it’s so difficult to trust in Him because of the circumstances which I’m in, I just got to hang on to the fact that He has been faithful and will always be, even when it doesn’t feel like it.

This was not how I expected to end my five years. I had a whole different picture the day I stepped in Semester 1. I had big dreams. I’d thought I’ll come out big and grand and proud of myself. Today, far from it. Those were naiive dreams of a young immature girl who hasn’t tasted the harshness of life (not that I already have tasted it even now). There’s so much more than to the grandeur of being a ‘doctor’ and status and money (which believe me, isn’t much when compared to the amount of work and time poured into it). There’s long hours, sacrifices of a family, sucking in when your seniors bully you, tolerating difficult patients, reality that death is inevitable even in the wisest hands, there’s pain, there’s loss…it’s a sick world out there who needs a lot of love, even when you don’t feel like loving it and these five years were meant to prepare me for that. To reach out to those who need me and my skills, to listen to those who are burdened with life’s never ending problems, to touch those who lost a loved one, to laugh with the mother who finally had her first child and to be amazed that God is still in control despite all of these. It’s pretty overwhelming… I don’t know if I’ll ever be prepared for such an important job like that. UGH! Wish me luck Pray for me… First, to get through final exams. sigh.

P.S. I Love You

Posted in Books on January 24, 2008 by Lydia

Back in those days studying medicine in KL, one of my closest friends, Leesha was super gracious to allow me to read this book by Cecelia Ahern…

9780007165001

and I loved this book to bits. If you’re looking for a good book to shed some tears… this would be it. I have never really REALLY teared and laughed while reading a book until I engaged in this one. I literally could not put the book down. It was so heart-clenching and warming in the same time.

Guess which page did my eyes started to become teary?

Page 6. Yes! You read it right. PAGE 6 and I never stopped tearing after every other chapter since. It’s just the way she writes which draws the reader into the story and you can literally feel what the main character of the book felt, in her struggle to come to terms with the loss of her husband and starting life over. It was amazing.

Extremely well written book – of course, only for those who like reading romance and humour.


 

Then I saw this…

505629~PS-I-Love-You-Posters 

The movie version of the book! Y’ know there could be no better person to portray Holly than Hilary Swank (she was really talented in Million Dollar Baby)… and dreamy Gerard Butler as her husband was the perfect choice and the trailer also played one of my favourite songs by Michelle Branch – "Breathe".

I’ve read that it has already been shown in the States since December but there’s no news when the movie will be released here. How disappointing! smile_sad

 

I do hope somehow I’d be able to get a hold of the show soon…
I’m in a sappy mood and need some sentimental romantic movies to sniffle over.

Hole in my door

Posted in Update on January 23, 2008 by Lydia

Some not-so-great things happened yesterday and in my daze from the situation accidentally locked my keys in my room just before heading back to uni for afternoon class. GREEAAT. I’ve never been so careless and it just had to happen on my second last week before I leave Batu Pahat. Got back from class in the evening and my housemate helped me destroy my door knob, pretty much to bits. Well, at least that fixed my problem…for now. I couldn’t imagine spending a night without a door knob and a hole in it!! Temporarily stuck a paper to cover the whole and used a chair to shut the door. Thankfully it was an on call night and there wasn’t much hours to sleep anyway!

A kind friend helped buy a cheap door knob in replacement for it. I decided to work on fixing it by myself. I know… I know to some of you out there, this is such a terribly simple task…but it was my first time! I got it fixed and am proud of myself. At least now I know how to fix a missing door knob. Now, to those of you who have not tried installing one yet, here’s what you need to do….

DSC00191 

   You need to start out with a missing door knob.
   That’s the key idea. (no pun intended)


 

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Next, buy a new door knob set.
This is called the latch. Mount this to the door first (I never knew that!!)


 

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Then detach the door knob piece by using the tiny ‘key’ that has been given to you and unhooking one of the knobs out….so you can slide the piece through the hole (!!)
It should look like this. Remember, the key hole side has to face the outside of your door and as you slide it through, make sure the mechanism of your latch hooks through to the mechanism of the knob (it’s beyond difficult to miss!!).

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Insert the knob which you have removed earlier and snap it into place.
Voila.. and I’ve got a door that’ll nicely close and lock me in my room for the night.

I deserve a pat on my back. *pat*