Just thought that I should post up some of the responses I’ve received in relation to my previous post about being a pastor’s daughter and seemingly living in a constrained and limited shell to express my true views. The first I received in an email because the amount of what this friend had to say could not fit in the comment box… of course. The other was a comment in Live Space, which I thought, might as well transfer it here. Here they are.
Do not live the way others expected you to live, and do not write what people expected you to write. What is there to a blog if all you write is to please people and to paint a picture of a perfect world? By doing this you are no different than an advertising company. Be free to break all boundaries that confine you; don’t be kept under the shadows of your parents, occupation or religion. In your previous post you mentioned about crying. Are no other emotions equally important as well? Or is it a sin to feel dissatisfied, displeased or unjust? Sometimes it is better to let them out and have a different perspective from others. Allow others to give words of wisdom or encouragement you sometimes fail to see under all those emotions. It is okay to be blind, but let’s not be blind forever. If people are unhappy about what you have written in your blog, let them be. Most likely these people would be there for you during good times only as well. True friends will always be there no matter what you write. Be open to criticism and value them as you would to a praise or advice. This has nothing to do with you not caring of what you wrote; I’m sure you’re very careful in selection of words and minding the readers’ feeling when you write a post. But I see no obligation for you to feel positive and happy in each post you write. Pretense is not who you are, Lydia…
Do not project yourself in cases of misfortune, instead learn from them. Promise yourself that you would not drive long distance after on-call as it is not worth it. Get them to come over if possible. If not, 3G technology is there to help. I’m not that well verse with 3G but if you are really interested, I suggest you look it up. Driving skill not good? Practice then. Can’t do anything about the long hours, but you can entertain the other factors. Some sacrifices are needed at times. Your safety comes first.
If you are really serious about going to do your housemanship in Australia, I suggest to get in touch with the authorities there. Calls, e-mails or even make a trip there. I’ve read somewhere that the Aussies are rejecting Malaysians from entering their country but I’m not sure of the details. Do clarify with them regarding this matter. If you need any help from me, do let me know. I’ll try to get in touch from some of my friends there.
You mentioned that you were picking up some culinary skills, am I right? Why don’t you come out with some signature dish? Or be really good in one (or several) of them? You’ll definitely need them if you are going to be away from home.
Holy cow, I seemed to be blabbering a lot, haven’t I? My comments are to be taken with a grain of salt, if you intend to take them. My utmost apology if I offended you in any way.
*Name has been changed to protect identity (by request of author)
For those who don’t know, I have been strongly considering getting a job in Australia. Because of the recent traumatic events, I haven’t quite been researching as much as I wanted to… and it appears like time is running out for me to scout for work there. Right now, it’s as if I’ve lost the want to do anything at all.
Yes, I’ve been trying my hand in learning to cook proper meals. *Friend, that was way back in the beginning of March. Of late, not at all. Lost the interest at the moment.
Here’s the second comment I’d like to post up. This is from a person whose identity I can’t seem to trace.
It’s funny to read that you mentioned that pastor’s kids should write happy stuff and that you wished that people won’t have pre-conceived notion about who you are. Well, first of all, who had ever declared that it is wrong and ‘unbecoming’ to write about the dark side of your life? Honestly, i don’t know about how is it to be a pastor’s child,but i do believe that it won’t automatically made you a saint or anything perfect. It’s alright for you to be honest with yourself. The ‘imperfect’ lydia is what the readers is concerned and cared about. Remember, nobody is perfect, not even those who is a devout christian and definitely not a doctor,sigh… Anyway, excuse me but the way you described your situation is quite amusing. God is our strength.
Both with rebuking content, both very honest responses, and to the both of you (if you’re reading this) I thank you from the bottom of my heart. In the midst of the true and open words I know you both bothered to write because you care for my well being. Both have given me the green light to express how I feel freely because I am no different even though I am a child of a church pastor. I am after all, a human with emotions… like you are.
Funny how the word ‘imperfect’ surfaced in the comment above, because I’d like to speak about it. “The imperfect Lydia”. As much as all of us are imperfect beings, yet so often at times, people only want perfect things, including me. I made a perfect list to find the perfect one. But the tables have been turned on me. I’m not “perfect” enough. Quite a difficult statement to believe, since I am a perfectionist myself (my (ex) housemate would totally agree to that!). Anyway, I shall not dwell on this too much for now. I have to be a little careful with what I say about this. Very personal. But who knows? I might reveal personal matters here soon. Til’ then, everybody, take care and stay safe.